oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize