Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
