I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
