You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
