Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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