their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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