escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
