We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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