I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
