her vagine was all disorganized.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I think a kid would responsible me up
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Randomize
