So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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