it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
