and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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