I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
