Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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