i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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