accomplished twins. life is a go
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
