Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
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