tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
