it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
