Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize