I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
