yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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