this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize