Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
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