I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.