R you on birth control?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?