I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
