If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
