handjob tips. give me some.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
