fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Well I just put wine in my tea
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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