all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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