before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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