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Princesses don't give blow jobs
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
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