My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
