Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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