If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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