I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Why did my mother make you get naked?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
