It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
