Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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