sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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