What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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