Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
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