Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
