Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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