her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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