Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
We need to get me chipped asap
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize