I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
