Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
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