His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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