you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
