Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
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He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
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I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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